Good Choice

I made the good choice on choosing the school to go to. As I see the summer starts it is the true test of the friendship. I always seem to catch myself in this same situation. WHere words are only words. I'm totally just using this blog at the momement to vent out the frustration I have at the current moment. I will hope to continue on this search that I've been trying to find for a while now of a reliable someone.

Resolve

So after talking to my sensi of life, Mr. Ryan Deleon. I have made a resolve for the solution to my dilema that has been created on Friday. The resolve is to contact the client this afternoon and late afternoon if the first call is unsucessful. Now if there is no answer from both phone calls then it is to cold turkey. No communication until the start of the semester. I think it is reasonable to call because I do want to know what went down on Friday. I must prepare for the time of when it is not picked up because I know will need something to keep my mind off of the situation until for a week. So I just pray I will be able to hold my resolve and just be determined to keep it.

I realize after this week that I have such a strong hold in the academic area; however, in the department of relationships or playing the game I lack the skills. It is as if I lose all my confidence and aura when it comes to this area. Like today in the supermarket, I notice someone, and I have not seen someone this impacting for a while since Greek kid. So what do I do when the person comes to my line at the check out? Nothing, so I need to be able to implant this voice in my head to go for it and ignore the memory of the Erin Dutcher asking out situation in 7th grade. I noticed that, that particular event really affected me for so long. So I was permenately damage from that Feb 14 day. Yeah that's right it was Valentines Day so that's why I can never forget that day. I guess I must relive my courageous move Sophmore year at Samahan. Asking a college person for their aim not their number but aim lol. Although that turned out horribly, it was positive because I used it for my sense of confidence. For now on I must make new memories of confidence and less Erin Dutcher moments. That's it folks for tonight. Now remember create new memories of cofidence boosters and less tragic memories. Peace out.

What the Fuck?!?

Just Keep Moving

So today was very interesting of a day. First of all lets talk about making plans. Is it just me or is it common courtesy if a friend makes plans for a day with another friend that one would call the other person if its not going to go down. I would think it would be worse if the friend waits there for about an hour or so trying to call the other friend to see if plans get canceled. It is okay for the plans to be canceled but it is worse that one would have to travel for about 20mins to get there. I mean it is kind of a let down, but it is what it is. So what could we or in this case what can I learn from this? Does it just mean not to really care about it and just move on. THat's what I would think I can get out of this. Can't really be an ass and shit to the kid you know. Just gotta remember what happened and just be aware of it when I make plans with him the next time. The evil side of me would think I should do the same thing, but I know I just can't do that. So game plan for what happened today is like the title says "Just Keep Moving." Don't let this small thing get to me and to stop moving. I need to use this as a way to see alright whatever. It is what it is, and I can't change things just gotta hope for the best. So the lesson for today is always make sure to confirm plans and don't just flake out without calling because it really is pretty messed up if you do that. Alright well this will be one and many blogs for this new year. I will make it a habit to blog at least once and every day.

Crushcrushcrush

I kknow its been  awhile since I blog. Its just the classes are really killin. I just really wanted to get this out of my chest so blogging was well needed. I really feel as if I need to crush the expectations, just really crush everythin that brings me down. The only way to go right? I wish I can get the courage to face it, but I have no clue in which I can be able to muster that strength. School is the only thing I know how to do well and now I notice I haven't been livin it. Livin life, alothough its a good thing to focus in school, it needs to be balance with living life. I find myself that I've been striped my social life in exchange of my success for school. So I feel as if I must crush my mentality of school being a priority. I think from now on I'm just going to crush my priorities and just go for whatever. I'll still put my effort in school, but try to live my life since these are the pime times. I have already seen the repercussions to my lack of social life. Its my fault and no one else. I made my schooling as a way to distract me from things I do not want to deal with. Its back but that's the way I go. Plus that's all I've known so well and know how to do. As for the area of field its just really ridiculous. I really don't know how to express it but I seriously feel as if I stayed in square one forever and I don't know how to make it to square two. I don't even know if it matters to be in square 2. Whatever seriously its just such a jumble now its as if I have been shock to see how school has consumed me. Who knows what'll happen in the next few months you know. Well I must sleep night.